


Wake up, Connor! It's me, Hank! (The Revenge Slap)

by LiteraturePROCESSING



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Adorable Connor, Because it's just Connor sleeping on a couch and being a cute soft boi, Connor (Detroit: Become Human) Swears, Connor (Detroit: Become Human) is So Done, Connor Deserves Happiness, Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Exactly What It Says on the Tin, Fluff, Good Dog Sumo (Detroit: Become Human), Hank Anderson Adopts Connor, It's pretty funny i hope, Meme, Memes, Not Beta Read, POV Hank Anderson, Poor Connor, Revenge, Revenge Slap, Some of these tags auto corrected themselves to some weird shit, Sumo is a good dog, The Revenge Slap, WAKE UP CONNOR! IT'S ME HANK!, WAKE UP LIEUTANANT, kind of, no beta we die like men, reversed, so now it's, tm - Freeform, until Hank slaps him to wake him up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 11:46:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18590629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiteraturePROCESSING/pseuds/LiteraturePROCESSING
Summary: Connor is rarely still in stasis when Hank wakes up and drags himself out of his room, but one time this rare occurrence does happen, the human happens to receive a report for something the pair need to investigate…He remembers the method Connor used to try and wake him up for the Eden Club investigation, and he just can’t resist the temptation.





	Wake up, Connor! It's me, Hank! (The Revenge Slap)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there.
> 
> Welcome to 'The Revenge Slap'. In which the tables are turned and Connor gets slapped.
> 
> yeah i saw this in one of my dbh servers and i said i was going to write a one shot for it and i did so here ye go
> 
> enjoy

Hank Anderson does not like waking up. He does not like being woken up by someone (or something) else. If he happens to have a hangover, that just makes it worse.

 

In conclusion, Hank Anderson just hates mornings.

 

So it’s a pleasant surprise when he re-joins the land of consciousness closer to ‘noon rather than the first ray of sunlight his robo-son detects with his ridiculously sharp, analytical vision.

 

When he manages to convince himself to leave his bed and get dressed, he finally checks his phone to see it has a couple of texts and a voice message. All of them are from his colleagues from the police station, wondering where he is.

 

Of course, after the revolution, Hank had taken Connor under his wing, letting him stay at his house (and ‘sleep’, or as Connor insisted it is called, go into ‘stasis’ on his couch) while the new deviant tried to figure out his new mess of emotions and what it really meant to be Connor. Some parts were more frustrating than others, including how Connor would insist on him waking up early and heading into the police station for work at the appropriate times. When the bill for android rights passed and his people received the right to work, own property and be seen as real people, the DPD re-instated him as Hank’s partner. This just intensified his efforts.

 

So of course, with Connor dragging him into the station when he’d much prefer to be sleeping near every morning, his fellow officers must have been getting used to seeing him there early. “Heheh, don’t get used to that shit, fuckers,” Hank grumbled to himself as he started making himself a cup of coffee.

 

 _Borf!_ Sumo barks in greeting.

 

“Good mornin’ to you too, Sumo.”

 

Connor would normally have cooked him some kind of breakfast before he woke up, but the android is evidently still sleeping (‘ _It’s called stasis, Hank’_ be damned, looks like sleeping, works like sleeping, I can’t be bothered to call it stasis, it’s sleeping, bitch). Looks like he gets to get some take away on the way to work this morning.

 

His coffee has finished brewing, and Hank gladly takes a sip of the dark, bitter liquid as he walks around the couch to face Connor.

 

And he usually is while in stasis, the RK800 is mostly deaf to the outside world, and several months ago, Connor rewrote some of his _‘end stasis’_ programming to make him respond and end stasis for a specific few statements, tones and sounds. So yes, Hank could often tease him using the human term _‘sleeping like a rock’_ in that he didn’t awaken to many of the sounds others made. That has let Hank prank him a couple of times, and he knows the androids of New Jericho have used this as a pranking opportunity more than once during the occasions when he ends up being overly tired at the android species’ new home.

 

Hank’s just finished his coffee when his phone starts vibrating. He checks the little device, finding that he and Connor have been given a mission- a location to investigate for a crime.

 

Hank goes to wake Connor up (using a phrase he knows Connor will react to) but pauses.

 

He remembers one time where their situations were reversed (except he was being a drunk fuck who was passed out on the kitchen floor), and he remembers, however foggy the memory is, Connor slapping him and yelling, _‘Wake up, Lieutenant! It’s me, Connor!’_ to try and wake him up so the android could get on with his investigating.

 

He then realises he’s in a pretty good position to get some revenge- a ‘revenge slap’.

 

Hank sets the empty coffee mug down, before turning back to the RK800. “Alright then, Connor,” he mutters with a mirthful grin.

 

He raises his arm, and the shitshow begins.

 

 _“WAKE UP, CONNOR!”_ The man bellows, slapping the android right across the face. His LED blares a bright yellow, suddenly spinning at a great speed as his eyes shoot open. _“IT’S ME, HANK!”_

 

Connor bolts off the couch and trips over his own feet, falling on the living room floor. “Wh- w-, why- WHAT THE FUCK!?” Connor seems to have realised exactly just what Hank said and did.

 

_“Did you just-”_

 

He’s cut off with Hank bursting into uncontrollable laughter.

 

“Hahahahahaaaahaaha, _YUP!”_

**Author's Note:**

> I laughed  
> I hope you did too :'D  
> If you enjoyed, please do leave a kudos <3 And I'd also really, really, really x1,000,000 appreciate it if you left a comment! I don't care if it's telling me to pull myself together and fix a mistake, a comment that's just filled with laughter or WHATEVER I appreciate them all very much :D
> 
> ~~~~~~~
> 
> Join 'Yellow LED', a Discord server dedicated to DBH and its fanworks!  
> https://discord.gg/BpUrb47
> 
> ~~~  
> when i was putting in the tags i pressed a button and accidentally opened a new tab and i was scared because i thought it had replaced the 'post new work' thing with it  
> also it corrected one of the 'sumo is a good boy' tag to something along the lines of 'John is no when now good' like wtf


End file.
